This experience wasn’t significant because there were feelings involved; I didn’t even know the guy. This experience was, sorry is, significant because some kid (I use the term kid to describe an 18 year old here) passed judgement on me for the way I looked and he humiliated me. Now, I know what you’re thinking “Oh stop whining because a guy judged your looks”. Let me paint the picture of how he did it and see what you think then.
Myself and a close friend from work decided to have a night out in Brighton. An important thing you should know is that my friend Jess* is gorgeous! Guys fall at her feet and they all instantly love her from the moment they see her. She’s the kind of girl you want to hate because she’s so pretty and guys are obsessed with her. But then you meet her and you find it impossible to hate her because she is so incredibly lovely and caring of others. I love spending time with Jess because she is oblivious to the attention she gets from guys and just wants to have a good night with everyone included. She is amazing to go for a night out with. At first I always feel self conscious and ugly around her (she’d hate me for saying that) but with her fun attitude, I usually forget that after a while and just enjoy myself. Jess is a good remedy when you just want a girls night out.
Anyway, back to our night out in Brighton. We got the train down and met some friends before heading to a few bars. It was a weeknight so relatively quiet but still a great night. As the evening continued on we lost our friends who headed home and left us to it. Jess and I were the only ones still standing and the student haunts were going to have to entertain us now. We headed to a small club on the beach front that had young students just turned 18 spilling out of the doorway. We were the oldest people there but we just wanted somewhere to go and dance! Walking in, we were hit with the scene of heaving students all sweaty and getting up close and personal with each other. I was still pretty sober at this point but Jess was not. I had been alternating my alcoholic drinks with lemonade to make sure we both got the night bus home safely.
As standard, Jess had been hit on more times that I could count but she remained the loyal friend and never left me. Say what you’re thinking, I’m just jealous because she’s prettier than me. I’m not denying it; of course I’m jealous but that’s normal so you can’t really judge me. In this little club, guys continued to fall at Jess but she continued to knock them down so we could have a girls night of dancing. This is where the story gets interesting and my usual dating horror theme comes in. Whilst on the dance floor, a group of maybe seven guys have spotted Jess and begin closing in around her. One of the young bucks moves in for the kill and starts dancing behind Jess; her being oblivious to this because she’s just having a good time. I am now watching the mating technique of an immature boy on my friend who just wants to dance. In this picture, I am now standing as an outsider trying to work my way back into the circle and back to Jess. Also, screw you guys, we came for a girls night so you can’t just push me out. Give me my friend back!
As I nudge one of the guys and say to him politely “excuse me, I’m just trying to get back to my friend”, he turns and looks at me. For a split second he looks me up and down, looks back over his shoulder at my friend and then turns to me again. He then felt it appropriate to open his face and say to me, without hesitation, “Look, we all want to get with your mate so we’re just waiting to see which one of us she’ll get with. Then I’m sure one of the others will get with her ugly mate”. Insert my shocked face here. Well that’s embarrassing. Yes, so I believe I am the ugly mate in this scenario and I’m ok with that but you don’t say that to someone’s face! You talk about it with your mates and judge people from afar. You don’t tell a girl she’s ugly right at her. Well, chivalry is obviously not dead!
I should have punched this guy square in the nose, or at least come up with some witty line about him being the ugly mate but I was so humiliated that all I could do was turn around and walk away where I sat by myself and waited for Jess to come over. All my insecurities started coming up like vomit into the front of my mind and I couldn’t make sense of what just happened. I mean, I have to hand it to the kid for having the balls to say something like that to my face. He must have known I could have taken the scrawny little git in a fight. After Jess came over, we left. My next few weeks were spent with his voice in my head telling me I’m the ugly friend. I truly hope he finds happiness with some girl who takes pity on his mates’ ugly friend.