David #2 – Teacher

After my David #1 didn’t go so well, I was already pretty sure that the name David probably has nothing to do with whether someone makes a good partner! My second David ended up being a mixture of chance and coincidence rolled into the package of a tall, handsome man with brown hair and glasses.

In my job, I meet new people every single day I turn up to work. Each day I work with different crew and obviously hundreds of different passengers too. You’d think it would be a great place to meet someone but I’m here to tell you that it’s like trying to find that lost sock you’re missing. One fateful night I was working on a short haul flight going to somewhere in Italy and back. On the return flight back home, I turned to ask my next passenger what he’d like to drink and it was a guy in his mid twenties I’d guess. I’m just going to mention again that he was very tall (even sat down), with dark, messy hair and glasses. He was very handsome! I smiled and asked him if he would like anything to drink to which he smiled back to me and mouthed the words apple juice please. I figured I had just missed what he said but read his lips enough to understand. As I passed the drink over to him sat next to the window, I noticed that his travel companions were all signing to each other. He mouthed the words thank you and smiled that big beaming smile again. So this young man is deaf. He is also mute. You’d think the story would end here but of course that wouldn’t be worth writing about.

Once the service was finished I sat for a little at the back of the cabin and read some of my book. Whilst halfway through a page I noticed two rather large shoes standing next to me so I looked up to see the same guy who had ordered the apple juice. I looked him in the eye and asked if I could get him anything and he pointed at the carton of apple juice on the side. I smiled and poured him a glass. We both stood in silence for a bit while he drank it. It was a little awkward but only because I felt like an idiot that I didn’t know how to communicate. Luckily this stranger knew what he was doing because he pointed at the book in my hand and silently asked what it was about. I looked directly at him and briefly explained which was slightly embarrassing considering I was reading a biographical book about depression written by a guy who had contemplated suicide. He tilted his head to one side as he read my lips and smiled, only looking away to point at the seat I was sat on followed by the one next to me. I gestured for him to sit with me and he did. For the next 10 minutes, we both sat and conversed by lip reading each other. It was difficult for me at first but he was very kind and spoke his words slowly. My new acquaintance was a teacher at a school for deaf children. He taught PE (cue hearts melting). Mr Handsome stood and went back to his seat but not before he pulled out his phone and asked me for my number. Just like that, with so much confidence so I couldn’t refuse. I saved my number and pointed to my name badge so he knew my name. He put his hand out in front of him, which I shook, and mouthed the name David. Oh come on. Of course his name is David! This was just a massive coincidence that this guy was thrown into my lap with the name I was interested in to go on dates.

David and I texted for a few weeks before finally meeting up for a drink. I already got from him that he was very sweet and considerate. He was very kind but also had a wicked sense of humour. He joked about us having a date and not being able to talk to each other which relaxed me a little. I was obviously anxious about the communication side of things but for him to joke about it made me feel at ease. On D day (date day or David day works too), I drove up to a bar roughly halfway between us as arranged and walked inside to see David sat at a little table. He caught my eye and stood up smiling at me. I went over and he hugged me. At this point I was suddenly very aware that I was going to have to watch his lips all night to lip read what he was saying to me. We managed through the first few minutes of hellos and how are yous before he handed me a drinks menu and asked me what I’d like. We were both driving so opted for some soft drinks in the end and David kindly went up to order. Once sat down, he pulled a small notepad and pen out onto the table and looked at me with a cheeky smile and laughed. There’s that sense of humour again. On the first page of the notepad it had written down ‘Just in case’.

The date was lovely. David was so lovely but, as expected, we struggled to communicate with each other throughout. I forgot to look at him so would sometimes look away while talking and he’d have to gesture for me to look at him because he couldn’t see what I was saying. I had to ask him to speak slowly so I could read his lips and I missed a lot of what he was talking about at times. David was so patient with me and bless him; he went to sign some words but then would apologise for forgetting I can’t read sign language. We laughed about it and it wasn’t uncomfortable at all; just difficult. We discussed our families and work and got on well despite a few silences. He laughed at one point and said people must think I’m crazy because I’m just talking out loud to someone but not getting anything in return! It was actually a really nice evening but neither of us could ignore how difficult it was to communicate. When we left, David hugged me and then stood and placed the most delicate of kisses on my forehead. He walked me to my car and we said goodnight.

When I got home, there was already a message from David waiting for me. He thanked me again for the evening and admitted to having a lovely time. He also went straight in and said that he understood if I didn’t want to meet up again because it was difficult for both of us. I did want to meet up again though. He was so lovely and I could always learn sign language. One of my best friends from Uni learned sign language so maybe I could ask her to help me. After a few more weeks of texting each other, David made the decision to call it a day on account of the fact we struggled to communicate with each other. He did leave it open and said that if either of us changed our minds, we could always meet up again and see what happens. I can’t blame him at all or even fault him in this because he was just such a decent guy! He was right; it had been difficult to communicate so I couldn’t be angry at him for being honest. Who knows, maybe I will learn sign language just in case.

Me – 1
The David Experiment – 1

 

David #1 – Something in PR?

The first subject in the David/Dave experiment, which is also my quest for finding a significant other, was a guy who I met through some friends of friends. An acquaintance from school got in touch with me via social media and asked if I minded being set up with a guy she knew through a friend. His name was David and she knew I was looking to go on dates with guys of that name as part of my blog. Why not? What did I have to lose? I agreed and gave her permission to pass on my number. David was quick to message me and jumped in quickly asking me about the blog and whether I really believed guys named David make the best boyfriends… Of course I don’t bloody agree! I just did some crappy research on trashy girly websites that have no science behind them and decided why not see what happens because it’ll be interesting to investigate to some extent. My friends who are married or in loving relationships are with guys with names of all sorts. In all honesty I was just a little curious.

After a week or so of texting, David and I met up for drinks. He was very attractive with dark hair and striking eyes. He was clean shaven and wore suit trousers and a shirt for our date. Oh god he’s dressed so smart and I’ve turned up in a t-shirt dress and black tights that looks a bit casual. Too late now! First impressions of David were good; he was charming, well spoken and came across like a gentleman. You know how people say first impressions are the mot important thing and they will be remembered forever despite anything else that happens afterwards? Well in this case, I remember second impressions more because the second impression wasn’t so good. David started to ask me about my work and then offered me the “how much do you earn?” question which I respectfully declined to answer. I was mortified that he’d asked me and tried to change the subject by asking him what he did for a living. Silly me for asking. He rushed through something about working in PR and looking after clients and accounts for his company and then, without any prompting from me, he went on to boast about his £80k salary!! Oh you read that right.

David went on and on about how much money he earns and how much he spends and what he spends it on. He talked about holidays he goes on (granted I go on a lot with my job but it’s work… sort of), he talked about cars he buys and watches and clothes: you name it! Now I won’t go into detail but I earn enough to pay my rent and bills and treat myself to the odd yoga class every so often but I certainly don’t live a champagne lifestyle. I’m lucky if I live a cheap white wine mixed with sparkling water lifestyle for goodness sake. When I say I’m broke I mean I have to choose between food or toilet paper for the week. It was clear that when he says he’s broke, it means he has to choose between a new yacht or a second holiday home in the south of France. For this reason, I hate talking about money with people. I pay for myself through life and will always offer to pay for my share of things on a date. Also, correct me if I’m wrong here, but I’m pretty sure it’s not etiquette to discuss finances with strangers! David only stopped talking about his abundance of money to drink from his champagne glass or to breathe. I can only assume he keeps a wad of £50 notes in his back pocket for the pure reason that only the finest money is allowed to caress his bottom instead of mere toilet tissue. Not that I’m judging or anything. If David had been modest about his earnings I wouldn’t have batted an eyelid at the whole evening. I would have continued to find him charming and a gentleman. Unfortunately his lack of appreciation for wealth and the importance he placed on his expensive material possessions let him down.

I absolutely think that David will meet a girl perfect for him who he will have a lot in common with. I know that she will be someone who, like David, comes from a family with wealth and continues to live a lavish lifestyle. Unfortunately, I am not that girl and I’m not sure I ever will be. I have grown to understand the importance of appreciating what I have and the value of money. There is more wealth in a substantial relationship and connection with somebody than in any material possessions I could ever own.

Me – 1
The David Experiment – 0

Is Your Name David? Dave?

Like most people, I spend a few minutes (hours) each day just scrolling through my Facebook news feed. I just get bored so have a look and see what people are up to. Recently I’ve begun to notice that my news feed is inundated with my Facebook friends getting into relationships, getting engaged, getting married, having babies, moving in together or simply just being happy in their little couples. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy for all of them and wish them all the best. I’m also bitter and jealous but I won’t hold that against them all. One thing I did pick up on though is that all these people call their other half ‘This One’. They’ll tag the person in the picture or status so we know who it is but no one seems to use their name. Instead every single couple use the pet name ‘The One’.

Evident by this blog, I only date guys with real, normal names. I apparently should be looking for someone born with the name This One because they seem to make great partners! Anyway, jokes aside, this got me to thinking whether a name really has got anything to do with finding a good partner. I know how ridiculous this sounds but apparently people have really done some research about this. As I embarked on an internet journey delving into cyberspace I find out that, apparently, the name David is top of the list when it comes to men who make good boyfriends or husbands! It’s actually the top of many lists that have been compiled and strewn across the world wide web for everyone to see. Kate is apparently the top name for women so I’m already one down. I’m actually already at least ten down because my name didn’t make the list.

From this extremely scientific research found on various reputable (trashy) websites, I decided that I would only date guys called David or Dave just to see if there was any truth behind it all. Armed with two dating apps on my phone I would only swipe yes to guys named David or Dave and see what happened. Obviously I would still swipe right to any of the England rugby team or Ryan Reynolds when they came up. I’m not going to completely limit myself. Don’t worry, I completely understand how absurd this all is.  During my swiping sessions, I also learned that I need someone to look over my profile on these apps because I didn’t get many matches so it was difficult to gauge how well this would go.

I realise that I have a previous frog whose name I changed to Dave for the purpose of this blog. His real name was not Dave. From now on, each frog will be posted using their real first name; you know, because they all have the same name for this!

So from here, the David experiment begins…